Children still
missing...
It is reported
that police entered an address at 11.30pm last night after reports from
neighbours that the children hadn’t been seen for days. It is said that the couple
that live in the house have two children, a boy and a girl, a neighbour claims
to have seen their Father leading them into the woods and returning two hours
later without them. Rather than seeming distressed it is reported that the couple had
shown nothing but relief. They were already on social services radar after
another neighbour had previously raised concerns that the children looked
malnourished.
An
urgent search of the woods is now underway with local residents joining the
hunt. A trail of breadcrumbs gave some brief hope but lead to nothing more than
a dead end and a group of hungry birds. Both parents are in custody as the
investigation continues.
Social Services under
strain...
Social
Services have become the subject of an in depth investigation after a chain of
errors. It is said that the final straw came after they failed to spot worrying
indicators in reports regarding a number of cases; the latest leading to a
young girl being attacked at her grannies, for whom she was the sole carer. She
was often seen wandering the remote area near her grannies alone and in a red
cloak not adequate enough for the harsh winter weather.
Social
services have cited the strain of the recent endemic of Evil Stepmothers for
their seeming negligence and say they need more services involved and aware of
this widespread problem.
Glass Slipper inc
being sued after loose fitting shoes fall off and shatter...
The
Princess started a trend for glass slippers but it seems whilst her losing one
lead to a very happy ending, most are not so lucky.
After a
spate of injuries due to the shoes falling off and, in a few terrifying
instances, shattering, a group of unhappy customers have launched a legal
battle against the shoes makers. One disgruntled fashion lover said, ‘These
shoes should never have been made, the glass they use is clearly not suitable
for purpose, I have no idea how to accessorise this limp.’
Princess
Cinder’s step-mother said she is not surprised that her step-daughter has
influenced so many into a bad decision. She can only be thankful that she is
finally away from her two beautiful and talented daughters.
Big Bad Wolf Legal have taken on the case.
Girl enters world record books for world’s strongest head...
The
blonde haired, blue eyed girl first applied for the record of ‘World’s Longest
Hair,’ with a length of several feet. However, once it became apparent that
grown men could use it as a rope to climb she was also entered into the books
for her abnormally strong head and neck.
Crack down on legal
highs...
Magic Bean is the latest drug to be given illegal
classification. This comes after party goers began growing to gigantic proportions after
consuming the drug.
